The “P” Word

Potty Training.

It’s time, it has been time, for the bebe in this house to pull on some big girl panties, and join the ranks of the big girls.

But I’m not ready.  I might have been avoiding this, purely for my own benefit.  Oh sure there are benefits, like not changing/buying/packing diapers.  But the downfalls are many… oh so many.  I have a list:

• Pee/Poop everywhere. 
• Laundry, laundry, laundry
• 500 hours spent in the bathroom
• and the worst, TAKING DOWN THE RAILS OF NAPPING BLISS.

I don’t wanna.  But I have to.  I mean when the bebe prefers to change her own diapers and wipe herself.  And when the bebe is potty training her baby dolls. 

But, BUT, the boy took forever, and he was nowhere near ready at this age… and, and, and…  And then the nights of wet sheets, and other horrors that I won’t even embarrass him on now…  It was awful.  Of course he was a boy, and we moved to a new house in the middle of it, and I made the mistake of using pull-ups at night and at nap times…

Oh the naps, the naps and bedtimes that will be destroyed, once the miracle of diapers come off.  The games of staying in bed and calling “potty” to make a break for it.  I miss you already nap time!  *whimpers*

And you dear pull-ups, my dear diapers with a fancy name that allows you to charge me twice as much, I’m going to miss you too.  I don’t think I can handle the games of waiting for the pull-ups to go on to relieve one’s tiny bladder.  Even though you have awesome new commercials with glow in the dark princess pull-ups!  Oh you tempt me so.

But no.  It’s time.  And such poor timing too, as I am out of coffee, well unless you count those little cups that just aren’t as helpful as a full pot sitting just waiting for your every topping off desire.

I best go give the washer and dryer a tune-up.

If you don’t hear from me in a week, please send help.

 

~Going Home~

When the prodigal son returns, he’s afraid.  Very afraid, as the bible tells us.  (keep reading, I’m not getting biblical on you)  He wasted his entire inheritance, abandoned his family, and screwed up royally.  Yet he goes home, faces the truth, and prepares to beg for forgiveness. 

Because at some point we all have to go home. 

But life doesn’t always follow the story.  Or maybe it always does, but it’s the path that becomes entirely different. 

We’re not prepared for the hill that lays in wait just before the doorstep.  The hill built out of fear, hate, spite, revenge, hurt, and denial.  The hill that our home has not built, but the one that the prodigal son has built himself.  And we can’t see our loved ones standing in circles around that hill with shovels, and spades, and even explosives, just waiting for the words to be spoken, just waiting to help tear down that hill.

Yet we choose to add to the hill.  Always heaping on more and more, making it seem impossible.

Until we despise the idea of going home all together.

But you see, going home is not an option you can choose to ignore.  Denying truths only eat at your soul.  One way or another you will climb that hill, eventually.

And just know you have a family, waiting to hold your hand…

NaNoWriMo ~ Because I Know.

It’s almost that time of year.  Okay so, technically, NaNoWriMo (National Novel Writing Month which you can find at www.nanowrimo.org ) doesn’t start until November 1st at 12am (and yes the time IS important), but now is the time to prepare.

Because this is serious stuff.

First for those who think I’m talking jibberish, NaNoWriMo is a orginization dedicated to raising money for national reading programs all geared to our youth.  Once a year they sponsor/poke/prod a huge national writing contest, where in we lose our minds and try to write a 50,000 word novel in under thirty days. 

So what’s the prize?  A brand new spanking novel in desperate need of editing, a printable certificate and spiffy little icon thingys you can paste everywhere.  (I have four of them ;p)  Oh, and knowing that you’re helping our wee ones read things BEYOND text messages. 

 

Rules?  You must sign up for a NaNo account, sooner is always better than later, but you can’t post novel info until November 1st, and honestly, don’t try to log in on that day, the site will be going bonkers.  You must submit your entire manuscript (no one reads it, and they can encrypt it too, if you are worried) for a offical word count before December 1st.  Other than that you can write anything, have your characters stutter for pages, and insert as many flashbacks as your little heart wants to.  It’s all on an honor system.

There are bonuses as well.  There are lots of promotions, offers, groups to join, write-ins and more.

So what should you be doing now?  That’s up to you.  Obviously you should go sign up, maybe donate some money, browse the site for tips, groups and info.  I like to have an idea of what I’m going to be writing way ahead of time.  This is the time when (if I’m going to do it this year, I have yet to decide) I develop a sketchy plot map.  I never follow it, but it’s nice to give yourself a wee bit of a boost.  Also I try to get to know my characters ahead of time, so their voices are about killing me before that first day. 

If I join in this year I already know my towns, the main conflict, one side conflict and all of my characters… and yes I may have issues.  ;p 

The point isn’t to actually write a book, or to get it published (because then I’d have four published books), but just to get out there and to get writing.

Are you in?

Have any questions?  (because we know I’m very helpful)

Big Old Bag of Nada

Here’s a big surprise for you…

I got nuttin.

Zip, zilch, zero, nada and all the like.  The big bag of ideas has been emptied, and even the lint has run dry. 

Yes, I know, it happens.  Keep writing and the ideas will return.  *rolls eyes*  I’m an expert at this whole big mountain of nothing.  But too, I’m lazy, and I have things to do and a bucket of paint that won’t make a mess of its self.

I want your ideas, even if you don’t have any.  Wanna guest post?  Great!  Wanna ask me five million questions?  Awesome.  Want me to share more of the book?  NOPE.  Fat chance.  Nice try.  Have an odd short story idea that you’re dying for me to butcher and manipulate?  I’ll take it!  Just shoot me an email with your ideas… please… soon……… h.e.l.p.

~Emily

When Billy Goats Stray into Your Yard

I need to have at hand one of those wise old women who can come up with a crazy theory as to why things happen.

You know the kind who say when your hip hurts on a Tuesday on the fourth week of the month it means it’s time to plant the broccoli?  That kind, I need one.  Maybe she would tell me that when a billy-goat shows up on your lawn on a Monday that maybe you shouldn’t dive into rehabbing your kitchen.  Or that maybe I should look into Goat Milk Recipes…

Or maybe that I shouldn’t joke around about wanting a cow, a horse and a puppy for my birthday… because with my luck I’ll end up with another animal to take care of.  *peeks out window to make sure said billy-goat has not come back*

She’d probably yell at me for being so flip floppy, and not knowing what direction to turn in almost everything I do.  Because being so flip floppy almost always leads to stray billy’s in your yard. 

Perhaps she’d shame me for wasting talents lately, or applaud me on taking a different path.  She might tell me it’s about time I didn’t waste so many moments in front of a tiny screen… or she might scream that I’ve been wasting a precious opportunity…

And then she’d bake me some awful, old world recipe cake, and she’d wrap up a roll of pennies for me, all heads up.  And she’d sing happy birthday to me, in an aged cracky voice, and remind me, that no matter what, I’ll find that right path, despite all odds.

At the end of her song she’d wrap up by yelling at me about how my health will suffer from eating too much cake and remind me to heed the billy goat’s warning…

I need one of them old women.  And I need that stray billy-goat to not come back.

~The End.

(yes that’s all I got)

Let’s See what’s Behind Door #2

All these changes, the drought, the healing, the this and that of life have shoved me down a different path.

It’s not a new path, I’ve been here before… but it’s been a long time, and the dust and cobwebs have taken over, making it hard for me to sort out what’s in front of me.

And with new paths come new ambitions.  (Actually I think that’s just me no matter what the path.)  Or maybe they’re not new ambitions, but more so that pieces are being rearranged, priorities being re-examined. 

Here’s what I’m looking at:

• I’ve shut down my dog training site and am now working on a new business plan to submit sooner than later for grants on a new non-profit venture that I’ve wanted to do since I was five.  It’s still dog training if you’re looking for a hint.  (If you know the ins and outs of any of this grant and non-profit business or want to help out please email me!)
• I’ve started working on a new blog (gasp!) that goes back to my original blogging style of more home and faith-based things.  I had to do it.  I need to get back to that place in my life.  And I needed to get away from wordpress and all their stupid rules of not posting affiliate links.  This economy begs that my time be spent increasing my family and home in one way or another.  WordPress I love ya, and this blog isn’t going anywhere, but you’ve hindered me for way too long.  For those interested I’ll be posting a link later when eveything is all set up and ready to go.
• And you’ll notice that I’m not on any social networking sites.  This part won’t last, I promise I’ll be back once my goals around here have been met. It’s that priority thing.  Which sucks because friends ARE a priority, just not so much the huge blocks of time it takes me to connect to even chat with my friends.  I’ll work it out somehow.  (However I am stalking pinterest again to motivate myself to complete said goals around the house)  (and emails, have I mentioned how much I love emails?)

So what about the book?  It’s still in the plans, just moved back a few slots in importance.  There’s a few major details I didn’t quite care for and I suppose I’m waiting for my muse to work those kinks out and get back to me.  The nice thing about not being with an agent or publisher yet is that I get to take months off when ever I choose, and I’m fully going to enjoy that advantage while I can.

❤